How Does It Feel To Be Adopted?
It was the year 1957.
My mother gave birth to my brother. My mother’s first husband had taken off. My mother was seeing my father.
22 months later I came into the picture. It was decided because my mother’s nerves were bad and she asked my parents to raise me. At the last moment my grandfather changed his mind. My father was distraught and he came to his brother for help. My dad.
At 7 days old I came to live with my aunt and uncle. With out any one knowing about me in the family. As secrets go the news leaked out. Another aunt found out and told my father’s family. The whole family was sworn to secrecy.
I was given the information that my folk could not look after me. At 30 before I was married I came across my. papers and they showed that my name use to Linda Marie. Mom was tight lipped and would not give me any more information.
I searched myself and 2 years later I found out my adoption was private. Again I asked and mom would not budge. It slipped out my older sister knew. I was furious and yelled it’s not fair.
I contacted my parents a year later. I was given my history and medical information. My mother wanted my sister not to know though my brother already knew. We had a fall out. I had sent her a copy of my story and she tore it up and she threatened legal action.
10 years later I self published my first book. 2 years ago I identified myself to my sister.
Lies secrets hurt. I have let my family off the hook. It’s not an easy thing to do. It has been quite a journey. I am now 56.
The years 1999 and 2000 were painful years. We were smoked out of our home at Christmas for 3 months. My emotional and physical health was at an all time low. Emotional pain as in very angry and super sensitive. My knees would give out with out warning and my back hurt all the time.
My mom’s health was deteriorating and we sold the family home.
We had financial stress as hubby was working part-time. We left our townhouse due to mismanagement of funds and me waking up with flash backs from the fire. Our marriage was strained.
Our church helped us through a very difficult time. I was helped with adoption issues. I did this by writing my birth mother how I was feeling about my adoption. I was encouraged to right about my life.
Ten long years later I self published my first book. I also was given counsel on issues on my adoption. I addressed my hurts and freedom came but not over night. Healing has been gradually.
I came out of hiding behind a mask and
found I was hiding from my identity and adoption.
I shared my testimony with friends from church with a cow out fit and then coming out as a Princess daughter of the king.
Two years I open up to my cousin sister and revealed to her I was her sister.
Healing came as now I was honest with every one.
I let go of hurt and grief and said good bye to the severed relationship at birth with my birth mother.
If you know the truth the truth will set you free.
Margaret Theriault, Adult Adoptee